Do you ever feel pulled or like you can never achieve balance? Would you like to feel balanced in your life?
If you are you trying to give time to a job, children, a marriage, or even to take care of your self you may never get there because these are all aspects that 
are external to you. Tending to these aspects is what can pull you off balance. If any of these areas are in the way of you being in your own purpose then you will be left feeling that things aren’t quite right. And an even stronger feeling that you need to fix that.
Balance is the feeling you get when you are meeting all of your internal needs and it helps when you know your self. Your internal needs are loving yourself and enjoying life experiences that bring you happiness. When someone else’s needs or something else is prioritized over you it can bring discomfort. It can also bring guilt because you want to honour these important people and areas of your life.
So, if balance does not have to do with how much focus you place on each of these external areas how do you know how to arrange your life to meet your internal happiness while meeting your obligations? The pendulum swings and this may look different at different times in your life. As your circumstances change you will need to attend to different outside expectations.
When you have a new baby your circumstances change, when you are home with young ones your circumstances change, if you go back to work your circumstances change, if you home-school your circumstances change and as your children grow and become more independent life keeps changing.
When you are in a phase where you are growing a family or a business and have to attend to a lot of external expectations it can be more difficult to maintain that feeling of balance but it is still possible. Notice what you are trying to balance and see if there is another way to look at it.
Sometimes the reality of what you have to get done can interfere with your own needs. This can be difficult because it means you may have to get used to being off balance at different times in your life. You may have to embrace some of the uncomfortable feelings that go along with your commitments. Just being aware of this can free you up to have more control and make more decisions that invite more lightness in.
You can do this by…
- Recognizing what your external obligations are. Become aware of the areas in your life that you are currently prioritizing.
- Pivoting your mindset. Instead of feeling obligated, show gratitude to these aspects for being in your life.
- Honouring your self. Know your own importance and place attention on loving yourself.
A practice that you can begin with to feel more balance in your life is taking time to be present with yourself. Reflect in silence on what you enjoy in life, on breathing, and on telling yourself that you love yourself. You can begin to be grateful for the external additions to your life and think about how you can serve them and help to fill their needs from a place of feeling fulfilled yourself.
Feel encouraged to become aware of all aspects of your life that you are trying to balance, spending time with yourself and releasing any uncomfortable feeling or guilt around this. As you think about this notice what it brings up, have a conversation about it and feel free to share your comments or ask me any questions.
Kaeli Van Regan is the author of “Parenting Your Way”, founder of Living Inside Out and Living Inside Out Press, a Certified Life Coach, Reiki Master and Energy Healer specializing in personal expansion for individuals and families. She has developed products and programs to provide guidance towards having balance in all aspects of life.
Her gifts include integrating her learning and experience to support people who feel overwhelmed or emotional and helps them to develop in their own lives.
Kaeli was brought up with an appreciation of nature and gratitude for life. As a dancer she experienced the pureness of leading from the heart and living a healthy lifestyle.
She lives in Old Ottawa East with her family. She and her life partner enjoy their 3 kids and are living a life of joy everyday.
You can connect with Kaeli at www.livinginsideout.ca
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